I’m not a person who makes New Year’s Resolutions – I never make them, because I never keep them. It always seems like a great idea, whatever it is, and by the end of January – I’m over whatever it is I promised myself I would do, and then I’m down on myself and whatever good I thought I could do has been replaced with anger and disappointment in myself. Who needs that?
My philosophy for the days ahead is to simply take care of myself – Physically, emotionally, spiritually… It’s all about balance and love and peace.
With that in mind – I’m going to try – mind you – I said try – and stay away from negative people whenever possible. You know the people I’m talking about. It’s those who are always spewing angry words and angry thoughts about everything from politics to why the grass isn’t green. Nothing in their life is right, and everyone else in the world is to blame. They are forever picking fights, they take responsibility for absolutely nothing and yet – they have all the answers.
You can’t talk to people like this – and honestly – why would you? They produce all this negative energy and you can feel it the moment you get close to them – have you ever noticed how the mood of a room full of people changes when one of these negative forces enters into the room? The room becomes dark and filled with angst. I’m going to avoid these people whenever I can. It’s not healthy and it’s not who I want to surround myself with.
I was raised in a family who loves to dwell in the past. I don’t know why, but they love to live in; who did what to whom, and why, and when, and how, and who said what, and did you know, and did you hear, and do you remember when, and she said what? Nothing is ever forgotten and the bad things seem to always be the focus. These things are passed from generation to generation and we are told that we don’t like someone because of something that happened 50 years before I was born. Seriously – this is just sick.
I don’t want to be a part of this anymore. I don’t want to be a part of a conversation that starts out with: “Did you know…” or “Did you hear…” Unless the story is upbeat and a story about the good of this person – I’m going to try to avoid the conversation. If I don’t, then I am as much to blame for the negative forces in the world as everyone else.
Yes, I understand that life sometimes put us into positions where avoiding these people is impossible, but I also believe that we allow ourselves to be manipulated into believing that we can somehow change these people or as I often found myself thinking – I could “save” them. In trying to save them, I was the one who was verbally, emotionally, and occasionally physically abused. It never ended well, and the person I thought I could save, had changed who I was forever.
Some people simply don’t want to change, and they are simply – who they are. Accept them for that and make up your own mind about how much time and effort you want to put into a relationship with someone who is such a negative force in the world.
The world is hard enough as it is, why surround yourself with people who only look at the negative side of everything and take no responsibility for anything? Why would you want to be with people who push your buttons and take delight in taking away your spirit?
I ask myself these questions all the time – and finally I have had the courage to walk away from several of these negative forces, some family, some friends – who it turns out were never really friends, and some acquaintances. I finally just said: “I’m done.” And you know what? The world didn’t end when I said I was done, and life has most certainly gone on – certainly with less drama and most certainly with me feeling more in control of my life.
Life is short – far too short to not be happy and content with who you are and what you give to the world. Be a force for good and walk away from that which does not nourish your soul…